Our Call to Action

1.   Educate yourself about the adverse effects and addictive nature of pornography on individuals, marriages and families.  Great resources for education can be found at https://fightthenewdrug.org/

2. Talk to your children about pornography

• Educate them on what to do if they encounter something inappropriate. Let them know they can turn to you, without guilt or judgement
• Educate them on the adverse effects of pornography

3. Open the communication with others 

• Now that you are educated, talk to anyone who will listen.  Start with your partner or spouse. Together we can help fight this new drug and help to save marriages and families.

WHAT ELSE CAN BE DONE? 

In your home:

• Make complaints about internet site you find offensive
• Write letters or call companies you feel are delivering an explicit message
• Set filters on computers and phones
• Sign the pledge to fight against pornography here

At your local/ state level:

• Get your congressman to get the term ‘obscene’ more clearly defined so we can start putting limitation on inappropriate material
• Become educated about the obscenity laws in your state

Explain This...

Obscenity is not protected by the 1st Amendment, so why is pornography! In 1973 obscenity became defined by the Miller test:

• "Would the average community member find that the material in question appeals to a morbid or degrading interest in sex?" 
• "Does it show or describe sexual content in a patently offensive way?" 
• "And then, considering a broader, nationwide audience, does it lack literary, artistic, political or scientific merit?" 

The problem you can see is that obscenity is loosely defined. If someone wanted to enforce this existing law under title 18, they would struggle with its vagueness, takes time and many people don’t want to spend the energy on it. But when they do it sends a message that the laws we do have are still enforced.

What We Believe...

We strongly believe that pornography is a threat to families! As many contributors to this blog are marriage and family studies majors we have spent our college careers studying the theories and dynamics of happy, engaged, loving families. We have dedicated ourselves to learning what makes marriages and families succeed!! Through extensive research we have found that pornography can damage the spirit and soul and cause those who habitually view it to lose sensitivity to the real, lasting, and committed love we as human beings all crave. It is an addiction, just as powerful as any drug. Please take a moment to view some of our findings.

What does research tell us?

-In 2017 on one website, 68 years-worth of videos were uploaded. The site also had 28.5 BILLION views which is 5 billion more views than it had in 2016. This amount of watching is equal to 3.75 views per person on the earth. There were 50,000 searches per minutes for the entire year, just on this one site. On top of that there was enough data and memory used to fill every single iPhone in the world that is in use right now. The demand for pornography is growing each year. Fight the New Drug (2017)

-In a study that was published this year, it was found that pornography lead to a fifty percent chance of divorce when both partners watched it. The study also found that pornography use and divorce were more closely associated with younger Americans who are known to be less religious (Perry & Schleifer, 2018). Pornography is linked to a lower desire to marry in young men and can also cause dissatisfaction in the marriage for a man and infidelity. This was stated in a bill passed in Utah in 2016.

-“…If these numbers are accurate, here's a very sobering statistic. Every year for the past decade there have been roughly 1 million divorces in the United States. If half of the people divorcing claim pornography as the culprit, that means there are 500,0900 marriages annually that are failing due to pornography.”-Skinner (2011)

-Pornography has enjoyed First Amendment protection since the 1950s. But according to title 18 U.S. code 1465 “production and transportation of obscene matters for sale and distribution are prohibited”, including interactive computer service. The hang up is the word “obscene”.

Here are some sobering statistics on pornography and its pervasiveness: 

J's Story

       Pornography is something that none of us can escape. We find it on the internet, on billboards, and at grocery stores as we are in line checking out. I found it when I was younger than 10 and typed something wrong into my search bar.  My friend J had a similar experience. She stumbled upon pornography in the 7th grade while playing on the computer with her friend. And like many, many other young children her curiosity spiked. She kept coming back, no matter how hard she tried to stay away.
       All the way through college this addiction followed her. "I hated it with every fiber in my being. I hated myself with every fiber in my being. I hated how angry I was, how withdrawn I was from other people, and how horrible I felt all the time. It was a short-term satisfaction traded for a lifetime of guilt." She writes.
      J did everything she could to get rid of this addiction, but nothing seemed to help, something kept pulling her back in. While still in college J met the man of her dreams. They got married and as she put it "I... was in the clear. Everything was smooth sailing" ...until one day the desire to go back was too strong. "It only takes two seconds" she writes. "[A]gain, the cycle of thinking I was a terrible person, feeling guilty, all that all over again. But this time I was married and I felt approximately ONE MILLION times worse. I had someone else I had to be accountable to, and I couldn’t hide my secrets. I wouldn’t hide my secrets. SO. I began the process again."  
     I love J and admire her bravery in telling the world about her fight with pornography. Visit her blog to read her full story and to hear how it is going now. She does an amazing job at offering hope and encouragement to those who need it.
   
For those who struggle with this addiction, you are not alone and there are people around you who want to help.  Follow J's example and get help. It is possible to change. If you know someone who struggles, let them know they are loved and are worthy of that love.

Plagues and Toxic Secrets

One of my most memorable birthdays was the year that we discovered my daughter had lice.  I spent my day treating and combing out her long hair, cleaning and vacuuming the house and cars, washing all of her bedding and laundry, and bagging up the stuffed animals.  I was utterly exhausted!  I also became overwhelmed with the fear that we wouldn’t be able to get rid of the lice and live like a normal family again.  I was so consumed by these fears that I couldn’t enjoy my birthday dinner or birthday cake.  But a little voice in my head kept saying to research about lice and the lice life cycle.  I began my research and found that the knowledge I gained would empower me to fight the plague of lice. 
 

Although the fight against lice is very different than fighting pornography, there are some similarities.  One is that we can become so afraid of pornography that we are immobilized by fear and try to avoid thinking about it and acting.  Another similarity is that many of us keep the fact that pornography has made its way into our homes a secret.  When we had lice, we didn’t want anyone to know about it, so we wouldn’t be socially ostracized.  Users of pornography often keep this secret from their spouses and family members.

To overcome plagues, we need to become empowered by knowledge and seek help.  There are many resources such as https://fightthenewdrug.org/ that we can turn to.  We also need to stop keeping secrets that are harmful, such as pornography use.  There are some secrets which are good like a surprise birthday party.  But many secrets are toxic and can tear marriages and families apart.  Take steps to let go of toxic secrets—go forward towards a healthier you and more intimate relationships.

Can Pornography Lead to Murder

The Link Between Serial killers and Pornography

“The only dark spot in his life became his need to kill. Bundy said it was an obsession that was brought on by his addiction to pornography. He said that he read numerous studies and had talked to other killers concerning the correlation between pornography and violence. His voice was steady and he spoke as a well-educated person. His interview shed more light on the reasons why some people get hooked on killing.”

https://serialkillershop.com/blogs/true-crime/the-5-creepiest-serial-killer-interviews-ever

“In his own words, Jeffrey Dahmer told Glass how he was always fascinated with dead things and taking out their entrails. As a disturbed young man, Dahmer said that he became addicted to violent pornography. Pretty soon, the make-believe magazines were not enough. He wanted to experience the killing and dismemberment for real.”

Escalating Factor

If you read the blog post about serial killers and pornography, you probably noticed that there is an escalating factor associated with pornography use.  Distributors of pornography cash in on this phenomenon because they know that as people become addicted to pornography they often keep wanting more and more.  So even though there is a lot of free pornography out there, addicts will begin to pay for more intense types of pornography to help try to satisfy the need.

Our brains have a reward center with “liking” and “wanting” systems that are impacted by pornography usage.  The Liking system provides the pleasurable feelings you experience when it is activated.  The chemical CREB is released and causes the pleasurable feelings to fade and leave the person satisfied.  If too much of the CREB chemical is released from engaging in addicted behaviors like using drugs and pornography, CREB will build up and the pleasure response becomes blocked.  The addicted person will find less enjoyment from their usage, so they will need more to feel a “high”.

The Wanting system uses the protein called DeltaFosB to rewire itself as a response to intensely pleasurable experiences.  This forms new brain connections, so the experiences are remembered and the desire to repeat the pleasurable experience becomes part of the brain wiring.   

The Wanting and Liking systems cause the user to want more and more even though they like it less and less, leading to the escalating use of pornography.  For more information, see Fight the New Drug.

Here is an additional video that talks some more about pornography addiction:

https://video.search.yahoo.com/yhs/search?fr=yhs-pty-pty_email&hsimp=yhs-pty_email&hspart=pty&p=videos+about+the+effects+of+pornography#id=6&vid=8cae4f973dcc30b079f158165da8eae7&action=click